Mum I’m so sorry I began to cry
I’ve been tough in your life and tell daddy it’s not his flute
Mummy you know I didn’t choose to be sick I’m sure you realize
Sorry for hating my life when everything is perfectly fine
Sorry for telling you how much I wanted to die I made you feel some sort of sad
Sorry for not eating mum
Tell me you love me I think I’m selfish even when I’m gone
I love you she said you can fight through this you’re a strong girl
She covered my eyes and told me to calm down
She held my hands,My mum.
My brain hurts and I’m questioning why Do I feel this way ,why do I have to feel this way
Why me ? I need to know what is it what do I need to heal?
Shhhh quite in a white room I was one day
This is the last time I will be breathing I thought
Teek toock where’s the watch I can’t seem to see its blurry and it’s cold
Heavy my breathing felt so I asked for my mum
An angle from god sent, when she came I finally can see once again
Beautiful she looked I’ve never seen her like this before
What do I need to heal inside of myself and my heart that is so badly damaged that makes me feel this way
What is in my past that made me feel this way
Why do I let everyone around me to go through this pain
What the fuck could it be??
Teek toock it’s the morning and I’m alive I think it’s another day
Noura alsaud
drawings and poetry, 2018-2022